She's a Man, Man!

I've been enjoying myself watching Olympic figure skating. Not because of the artistry, athletic ability, or the thrill of chanting "U S A." No, I've enjoyed it for very different reasons. It's freaking hilarious! Honestly, it's like being led into a barn full of fat, lazy turkeys, given a shotgun and told to "Go hog wild." Only the shotgun is actually jokes about ridiculous outfits and borderline pedophilic one liners from the commentators (I'm looking at you Scott Hamilton).

As a side benefit of watching the comedy show on ice, I've stuck around for the late night show with Mary Carillo. And I'll be a stuffed ground squirrel if she isn't a dead ringer for Bruce Jenner. Just take a look:

(Because I understand how difficult it is to tell the two apart: this is Bruce Jenner.)

(This is Mary Carillo.)

Now, granted Mary is a few face-lifts away from the deer in the headlights perma-grin of Bruce. But the hair, the teeth, the crazy high cheek bones? Just try to convince me they weren't separated at birth (I feel a LifeTime movie coming on: "Not without my Jenner" starring the Olsen twins).

When I first saw her with Bob Costas, the TV was on mute and I was like "Wow, what's Bruce Jenner doing at the Winter Olympics?" Then Natalie told me it wasn't Bruce. And that's when things got all crazy for me. Now whenever Natalie's watching Keeping up with the Kardashians (it's really sad that I spelled that right on the first try), I'm like "Is that Bruce Jenner or Mary Carillo?" And that totally throws off my timing when I'm trying to make fun of that show. It's really frustrating.

On a sidenote, while searching for Mary Carillo in Google images—this was one of the results:

(Hey Beijing, smell you later!)