Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Maternity Leave

My maternity leave ended last week. It was a really sad day for me. After having Ollie all I wanted to do was to be his mom and devote all my time to him. These past 3 months have been life changing. I had the best time and some not so great times. Being a mom is awesome, but it's really hard. However I feel blessed that we were able to save up 3 months worth of my salary so I could stay home and have the time with Ollie.

Ollie and I had a good thing going. He slept through the night. We would get up for the day around 10. Then we would get ready and eat lunch. After lunch we would usually visit with my mom and Michelle, run errands, do housework, play, relax, have feedings, diaper changes, naps, crying fits, lots of smiles and then Josh would come home. It was great to just focus on him. I knew that would all end so I tried to treasure the time as much as possible.

What is it like being back at work? It's ok. My job is a little weird right now, but more on that later. I miss Ollie a lot and our routine. Being at work feels like I never left because most things are the same. For some reason I thought everything would be different but it's pretty much the same. Since I have started back at work Ollie doesn't sleep through the night. He has only done it once (and it was a wonderful night). He doesn't go to bed till around midnight then wakes at 2 then 5 and then at 7 I get ready and I wake him at 8 to eat. I'm hoping he is just off because of the change in his routine. Poor little guy. So I average 5-6 hours of sleep which I absolutely hate! I'm exhausted and it's only a matter of time before I get sick. Plus I have to remember to pack so many things in the morning: my purse, lunch, pumping supplies, diaper bag, extra clothes and his car seat. I am overloaded when I leave the house!

But we are really blessed. My mom watches Ollie and I don't have to worry about him at all because I know he is in good hands. He finally took the bottle right before I went back to work. We both have jobs and are able to provide for our family. Most of all I feel blessed to have Ollie as my son. I love him so much!

I just wish this was easier. I just need to remember nothing stays the same and things always work out eventually. Sorry if this is a bummer post. I just wish this new chapter of being a working mom was better.

Here is Ollie on Halloween as a Sheriff. He is the most adorable sheriff ever. He costume is complete with spurs and a hand gun. I will do a Halloween post later with more details.

3 comments:

Kylie said...

I feel you, Natalie. It's hard. And I laughed when I read about how you thought it would be different, because I had the exact same reaction. Everything has changed for you, so everything must have changed everywhere, right?
I try to just value what time I do have with Walt - and also to take advantage of and value my alone time (lunch hour), something I don't get at home anymore. Good luck, I think it'll get easier for you.

Jen said...

Hey Nat...I'm so happy you had so much time before having to go back to work. But going back is definitely the worst! It will take some adjusting, but hopefully things will get better for you. Loved the update...

mandy said...

Your post almost made me cry! Thing will get better and you will find a new routine. Can't wait to meet the little guy!